"What are the chances, silly?"
You jinxed yourself, and you knew it.
It was silent, almost enough for a feather to fall in the room and be heard by human ears. You were sitting with your companion beside you, not exchanging a word to each other as the atmosphere seemed to get tenser by each passing second. You then released a sigh, scratching your cheek with your index finger absentmindedly as you stared up at the dim light on the ceiling.
"Hey, Levi?" You called out quietly, your voice seemingly louder than it really was. You tilted your head towards him and found his gaze fixated on the ground.
After a moment of silence, he replied. "What?" It was short and definitely not amused. You couldn't blame him for acting this way, though. After all, you had just told him that the Survey Corps were going to go out on yet another expedition in two days. It was only yesterday that you went outside the walls, almost crushed by the hands of a titan. Then, here you were, sitting beside a disgruntled Levi as he tried to take the news in.
You leaned on him and placed your head on his shoulder, closing your eyes and extended your arms to hold over his clenched fists. Your eyebrows started to furrow slightly when you heard him exhale a shaky breath. Cracking your eyes open, you saw that his eyes were shut close in a deep thought. Your stomach churned lightly and you couldn't help but feel anxious and guilty, knowing that he still had his guards up after the incident yesterday. You were still wounded, too.
"I'm sorry," you whispered, "I know you told me I should quit Survey Corps, but..." You trailed off, your body turning limp as you burrowed your face on the crook of his neck.
Levi was nothing more than a one-man thug. He wasn't a respected soldier nor was he humanity's strongest; his name wasn't known, but he was feared. He instilled terror within the walls, roaming around without a goal. But then he met you. It was an ironic encounter. His gear broke down without him knowing, and injured himself as he traveled with it. You just happened to pass by, more than hopeless at that time. You were a trainee, at the brink of losing all inspiration and giving up. But you saw him and helped him recuperate, although Levi was more than unwilling to accept your help. It was a normal injury among the trainees, you told him. He grunted in annoyance and finally gave in. A simple act gave you a reason to live a while longer.
Days passed, and you started to visit him a little more often. You made sure no one knew of your little rendezvous with Levi, always remembering to wear a coat that hid your identity. He was a man with a dry sense of humor, not to mention blunt with his words. Slowly, with every conversation you had with him, your views started to change. You started to see the world in a new point of view, and began to hold onto your hope tighter than before. Levi started to cease his criminal acts, and he became nothing more than quiet whispers of rumors. For all the time Levi let you stay at his place and for every little subtle things he decided to do, you repaid him with something cruel.
Levi finally opened his eyes and turned his head towards you and nudged his nose onto the strands of you hair. Inhaling deeply, he freed his slender arms from your grasp and embraced your figure. This was the first time he showed his affection openly and directly in all five years of knowing him. He held you firmly in his arms, resting his forehead on your shoulder. You sat there, surprised. But you could feel your heart lurch and your stomach churn as you shakily returned the hug. He trusted you, he believed in you.
"I'll be waiting waiting for you. That's why, shitty brat, come back..."
"... Alive," you choked out painfully. You found yourself unable to move your limbs at all as you rested by the tree trunk in the middle of a grass plain, open for any passing titans to see. You could barely smell the scent of your coppery blood that seeped through your clothes and drenched the grass around you. Your eyes felt heavy, and you couldn't bring yourself to say another word. Your throat was parched, and the sun was beating down on your dying form.
Thunderous footsteps came in quick and threatening like a jolt of electricity. It didn't register in your mind, though. Slowly, you were lifted by a gigantic hand that seemed to hold onto you gently when it actually applied such a pressure where your bones were getting crushed. Yet, despite being somewhat aware that this was your end, you couldn't muster enough energy to feel fear. All you felt was an overwhelming sadness and regret as tears flowed freely, dripping down on the soil far below you.
'I can't make it back alive now, Levi. I'm sorry.'
As the Survey Corps came riding back on horseback and on wagons filled with corpses, it was the expected murmurs of disapproval, annoyance, anger, disappointment, and sadness. The stench of carcasses were strong and it invited a heavy atmosphere. Everything seemed still as they passed through, heads hung low. Yet, there was one person in the midst of the crowd who quietly followed the group until there were no more civilians left to watch the depressing scene, nimbly moving through the roofs along the road. A wiry figure clad in a tattered, black cloak.
'I don't see...' Levi's thought trailed off, taking a dangerous and panicked route. His breathing started to get rougher, pace getting faster. His eyes scanned the group, trying to find you anywhere among all the other soldiers. When he reached the end of the line, he lost it. Levi couldn't find your familiar hair and couldn't locate your unique way of walking.
Six years. If you were still alive, in a few months you would've known each other for another year.
He screamed out your name, demanding where you were loud in display of unusual and remarkable emotion. Levi jumped down from the roof and dashed at them, the hood falling back and revealing his face. It was eerily calm, but anyone that saw his eyes could see the panic and the dark scowl that signified his wariness. The members of the Corps turned their heads around towards the source of disturbance and with wide eyes started to frantically call out for their commander.
Erwin. Erwin Smith was his name; the name that will be forever engraved into Levi's head as the his large hand grabbed a fistful of the restrained, beaten Levi's hair. The taller man stared at Levi with a chilling look, and his eyes softened the very slightest of a fraction.
"My condolences to you. Soldier (y/n) (l/n) is no longer here with us."